"HEY JO, I WROTE A SONG TODAY...ITS CALLED GET UP!"

DISCLAIMER(S):
1. The author does not, in any way, profit from the story and that all creative rights to the characters belong to their original creator(s).
2. Thou shalt not needlessly waste your time by reading further if thou has not the least idea about Chandler Bing a.k.a Matthew Perry… ( the vice-versa might no be true).
3. Don’t proceed any further if you have been advised by some nut to abstain from laughin’.


Well, now that it s just me n all those ppl who claim to know who chandler bing is and have the liberty of creatin a laugh riot, I will present to you some of the most hilarious comments ever made on planet earth…. These r not goin to be in any kinda order and they r gonna be my fav 15. M jus gonna put ‘em up the way I want to!! ( it’s MY blog!! :-) )

1) Ross: i got the gift of time!!!

Chandler: thats nice.. last christmas i got the gift of space.. why dont we join it together and make it a continuem!!

Oki… nw its upto u guys to imagine hw chandler makes up that face of his durin each dialogue delivery n does all that movement with his arms..

2) There s this episode where joey tries to sell the entertaimment center n gets locked n robbed

Joey: I was tryin’ to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what I’m gonna do?

Chandler: BEND OVER?!!!

I jus feel sometimes if there ever has been a guy with a better sense of one liners…!!!??

3) This one s wen Ross has just slept with another woman after breaking up with Rachel. Chandler s obviously surprised at hw fast Ross s gotten over it!!

Chandler: You slept with another woman 3 hrs after breaking up with Rachel ?? Come on.. Bullets have left guns slower !!

4) Now its jus not humanly possible of u to NOT have seen this episode or this scene (at least!!).
Chandler n Joey are supposed to be takin care of Ross’s baby n they end up losin him in a bus. They go to human services department to find the baby….. There r two similar lookin babies. One wearin a dress havin clowns printed on it n the other one has ducks n they don know which one to take bk home. They decide to flip and hence assign smthn to heads n tails….

JOEY: Ducks is heads becoz ducks hav heads!!

CHANDLER: Kind of scary ass clowns came to ur birthday party??!!

5) Ever felt bad for Candler and also felt lik laughin a t the same time?? Here goes…
Chandler n Monica try makin’ love & chandler's thing doesn't work. He gets very upset abt it and goes to Joey's place…. looks at the fuseball table... And says.."...Sure, you guyz don't have any thing to worry about, you're made of WOOD..."
He also says this once after a similar kinda incident wen he s unable to perform in bed with Mon…
"In high school, I failed in biology, but tonight…… biology failed me"..

6) Once Rachel gets pissed that chandler saw her "boobies" by mistake while coming out of the shower and in reciprocation she wants to see his "pee pee".

Ross: You must show her your pee pee.

Rachel: Yes thats correct,you saw mine..i should see yours….tit for tat.

Chandler: I am not showing you my TAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
(That was a killer!!!)

7) Oki…. Nw this 7th one s gonna need u to imagine hw he says things wen he s desperately frustrated at Joey’s wisdom (or rather.. The lack of it)..

Chandler: [To Joey who's removing his tie] Would you put that back on? Monica's gonna be here any minute!

Joey: But it hurt's my Joey's Apple.

Chandler: [frustrated] Okay, for the last time. It's not named for each individual man!!!

8) Take this for a one liner… right out of the blues!!!!

"U wanna do somethin diff ?? Then lets try loosing our virginities again, cos i think mine is growing back!!"

9) I have to admit there s no hierarchy in ths list…. Otherwise this one wud have been smwr right up there!!!!

Joey: lets name the chick's and duck's kid as CHUCK

Chandler: or DICK

10 & 11) This one again goes one to prove what he thinks of Joey…
During his marriage with monica…

The greek padre asks him "are you Chandler?"

And he asks back, "Are you Joey???????!!!!"

When Joey asks him if he looked 19..Chandler replies......Oh!! yes.....on a scale of 1 to 10....10 being the dumbest a person can look u r DEFINITELY 19

12 & 13) Chandler must have lived some time as the Greek God of sarcarsm or something!!! Have a look at these two…

Once when Phoebe and the Bing's were fighting over their guy who wud go to the charity ball with Rachel.....they happen to be bragging about their guy's qualities....

Phoebe: Have you seen your guy’s body?

Chandler: No, our guy is just a floating head!!!

Monica and Mike are playing pingpong and chandler keeps talkin away, which both of them ignore..

Chandler : “I wonder if i shud use my invisibility to fight crime or do evil .. ?”

14) Took me some time to get this.. Bu sent me rollin wen I did….!

When all of ’em r at central perk and Ross asks for a "cheque"…. Chandler says, “ why not a Yugoslav.…?? ”

15) Nw this one is the last but in no way the least!! It s wen Joey has this Australian room mate and is weaving a sweater wit her. Joey invites Chandler to join but he says "NO THANKS JOSEPHEEN!!” Chandler then goes over to Ross's place and finds him puttin on some make up and then he goes…….. "OH MY GOD, WHERE ARE ALL THE MEN? "

I was jus watchin silence of the lambs the other day wen I thot to myself…. Of course lambs must be scarier than ducks.. Else they’d ve called it silence of the ducks!!!!

long live C.B .............